Reverto!
The (Quickly Disappearing) Bridge between the Magical and the Commercial
by Cooper Lewis
February 13, 2005
“W-ats! They’re mean, their pretty, they were skimpy clothing, and they’re magical! They’re a cross between Wizards and the popular BRATS dolls!”
“Oh my god, Lavender, Viktor Krum is sooo hott!” says the Hermione W-at Doll, dressed in a red and yellow Gryffindor spaghetti strap.
“Hermione, you’re Harry’s B.F.! Duh!” replies Lavender the W-at, idly twirling a Cellular Wand, ready to speed dial that Sex-God Dean Thomas as soon as she stopped by the Great Mall to get her belly-button pierced.
The Hermione W-at smiled, brattily, and says with a smirk, “But Viktor doesn’t know that! LOL!” Both W-ats turn and face the camera, smiling and winking stupidly.
“Mom! I want a W-at!”
OK, Potterfans, wake up from that nightmarish vision. Yes, W-ats are fictional monsters of my own invention, but that may not be the case for long. I fear that Harry Potter (now and forever to be denoted with a ™, a ©, or a ®) is on its way to the same graveyard Commercialism has led so many other good ideas to. It started out as a practical literary phenomenon: what was essentially a children’s book gained fame around the world and across the generations. Parents, amazed to see their children’s noses deep in a book, pick up Harry Potter, making sure that no comic books or game boys have been inserted into its pages.
What they find, usually, is a universe that appeals to them just as much as their children. They begin to read, and dinnertime conversation soon revolves around Harry Potter, and Dumbledore, and muggles…
In a few years, I fear it will be a very different picture. Around Christmas, children begin to clamor for W-ats, or some like product. The rest of the year, they whine and crave to collect the rest of the W-ats, the Lumos ® wand, the Basilisk Egg ™ cereal, Potter Flakes, Weasley Wheaties….and Voldemort knows what else. A seven year-old named Tina breaks down at Target when her Daddy doesn’t buy her the $49.99 Dobby doll, kicking over a bookshelf, filled with Harry Potter books, which she hasn’t read.
Parents, far from being inspired by JK Rowling’s work, would become repulsed by it, just as they have been repulsed by Furby, Pikachu, and Power Ranger.
We all must be careful. If Time-Warner begins to cross the bridge between commercial greed and magical fun, we must be ready to respond viciously, swiftly, and effectively.
Movies and Dramatizations of Harry Potter do not cross this bridge—indeed, the most recent Harry Potter movie, The Prisoner of Azkaban, almost impeccably captured the spirit of the novel. Note that Talking Baby Dinky, the Offspring of Talking Dobby and Crying Winky, does NOT at all capture the spirit of the novels.
Video Games? Why not? They are realistic, interactive, and might even convince a ‘gamer’ or two to read a book (or seven).
But a W-at Attack? Count this Potterfan out.
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